"Weeping may tarry on all through the night, but your joy comes in the morning" Psalm 30:5

 I woke crying, 

i kept seeing her broken body, holding it, pleading with God and whispering courage to her, to be brave...isnt that what she whispered to me when I needed courage...all the images, breaking my heart in the night.


I guess letting go will be a process 😔 ... isnt grief, love persevering?


...she gave me my first bath, I helped give her her last, with this beautiful angel who came to help, lovingly bathing her broken body. 


Oh how i need jesus to come and heal this brokenness I I feel


…sitting in my sorrow…in the quiet now, i play a song that Katie sent me and the words go deep…Jesus you’re close




“When i’m feeling low

 and my heart is weak 

 i know you have the strength 

 to carry me

 When i’m broken down

 and i’m filled with grief

 i know you’re far beyond

 what my mind conceives 

 As I look beyond the cares of life

 I can feel your heart

 Through the pain and strife

 As I look beyond the cares of life

 I can feel your heart

 feel you wash my sight

 i can feel your heart

 feel you offer life

 you lead me to the water, sweet water

 the water of life

 when i am sinking, you lift me 

 up out of the night “ 


-feeling low-will regan



It's raining and quiet here in SF, a pitter patter of little foot steps across the floor, a part of my healing comes to me in the precious form of little Lucy Renee and she sits quietly with me, some how knowing the sadness of my heart and I am again comforted.

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