Waiting

journeying on...a photo i took as pelicans flew over 

 I just realized I haven't posted on my blog for at least 5 months. I tried today to post something and took it right down, because it just didn't convey what I really wanted it to. It's like my words were falling short, failing me. I couldn't convey well what's in my heart to say.  Usually writing is an outlet for me when Im struggling, but the creative process feels stifled. I guess i blame a lot of this on the fact that my life feels tethered to the disease that continues to steal from me.

WAITING...Big Sigh! In many ways that's what Ive been doing these many months. Living in a perpetual state of hurrying up and waiting. Watching as Alzheimers claims more and more of my precious moms life. It has slowly but consistently stolen her life away from her, from us. As it progresses Its like I can't breath fully. I find myself just this side of happiness as things worsen and become more difficult. Sadly release from her suffering means death and that overshadows my heart.

I knew this journey would be a difficult one...this long goodbye.

My one comfort in all of this is knowing that she truly is finishing her race here on earth. It doesn't look at all like I had imagined it would for her....But she has always clung to her faith and her Lord..."pressing on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling her. phil 3:14   I often hear her voice telling me to live fully, to get up and finish my race! I clearly hear her voice nudging me on.

I have found a  few more encouraging scriptures- that have given comfort...

• Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.

-psalms 23:4 

 • Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.-psalms 116:15

 • “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand.” (Jesus speaking) John 10:27-29

• For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39

• For if we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. So then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s. Romans 14:8

 • And I heard a voice from heaven saying, “Write this: Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on.” “Blessed indeed,” says the Spirit, “that they may rest from their labors, for their deeds follow them!” Revelations 14:13

These are some Encouraging Quotes...

“They that love beyond the world cannot be separated by it. Death cannot kill what never dies.” ~ Williams Penn

 “When the time comes for you to die, you need not be afraid, because death cannot separate you from God’s love.” ~ Charles H. Spurgeon

 “It is better for me to die in behalf of Jesus Christ, than to reign over all the ends of the earth.” ~ Ignatius of Antioch

 “He whose head is in heaven need not fear to put his feet into the grave.” ~ Matthew Henry

“Has this world been so kind to you that you should leave with regret? There are better things ahead than any we leave behind.”  ~ C.S. Lewis

YES... Mr. Lewis from the deepest parts of me I KNOW this to be true...

"There are better things ahead, than any we leave behind.” 

my beautiful Mom

Add caption

you're with me always...

http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/bible-verses-about-death/